Is That My Alter Ego - Chapter 109



Chapter 109 – Friends

“Hey! What are you doing here!”

“… Ugh, what does it look like? I’m reading a book.”

“Oh~ what book could it possibly be? The others are waiting.”

“Ha, fine. I’ll go.”

It was my friends who helped me endure the unbearable thoughts of wanting to die every day.

With the support of the remaining family, I barely managed to secure a small studio apartment, and my hopes were no different from theirs.

Is it not said that the greatest influences on one’s character are parents and friends?

I believed that the reason I could live without straying was precisely because of them. I had received such immense help that I held those words true.

I had few whom I could truly call friends. I was not the type to reach out first to make friends, and I had endured such difficult times that I simply had no room for it.

“…Hey, don’t worry. We’re here, right?”

“Hey, why the long face? We’re here, and you’ve got a pretty girlfriend too!”

“….Ha. Thank you. Really.”

These few, whom I could call ‘friends.’ They could be considered the second saviors of my life.

Friends from school are those with whom you share closeness and comfort, but that also means conflicts can arise.

Sometimes, conflicts lead to never seeing each other again, but there are also those who, overcoming strife, become even closer.

Yet, despite going through middle and high school together, we had never once fought during all that long time.

We joked around and shared many laughs, but we never crossed the line.

I remember when we traveled together during the break. Sneaking in drinks, we shared honest stories.

“….I’ve really struggled. This is just between us.”

“Ugh… me too. There have been really tough times.”

Alcohol can ruin a person, but it can also make one more honest.

In our drunken state, we quietly sat and shared our stories. The things we had gone through, the days we had silently cried beneath bright masks.

We pretended to be strong, but we were all just fragile children. That day, as we cried and laughed together, we became a second family.

Pain lessens the more it is shared, and laughter multiplies when shared.

When one of us was struggling, we became pillars of support, and when one strayed, we earnestly guided them back. When it was time to laugh, we joked and laughed—truly wonderful friends.

I was grateful that the few friends I had left were them. They were so kind and good-hearted, and I felt fortunate.

“Hey, don’t forget to reach out! Don’t just be on the phone with your girlfriend!”

“Okay, okay, I got it.”

Having safely finished the college entrance exam, we had planned to go on a trip. But suddenly, I had to help out with something and couldn’t go.

After seeing my friends off, their faces lit with excitement as they shed all burdens, I called my girlfriend.

Click.

-Hello?

“Hey, it’s me.”

-Oh! I knew it was you! So, why did you call?

“…Just wanted to hear your voice.”

– Hehe… what is this~

I had a girlfriend. Beautiful enough to turn every head as we strolled, and so incredibly kind.

Our first encounter was during a blind date that was all the rage among friends.

I was merely there to fill a seat, and perhaps she was too, sipping her drink quietly.

When I first laid eyes on her, I thought a goddess had descended. Her looks rivaled those of any celebrity, and after a few exchanged words, her heart seemed just as pure.

To be honest, I felt a spark of interest. But isn’t it true that attraction must be on the same level?

I was just an utterly ordinary human, while she was a goddess wrapped in blessings. I had given up long before.

“Huuh…”

Unable to endure the atmosphere of the social butterflies, I eventually made an excuse to step outside for some air, leaving the chicken shop behind.

I… found this more comfortable. Honestly, even now, aside from my friends, facing someone was still a bit daunting.

“Um… may I join you?”

“…Huh?”

In that moment of self-pity, she stood beside me. When she asked if she could stay, I reluctantly nodded.

“Hehe… those kinds of gatherings can be a bit awkward, right?”

“….Yes. I think it’s a bit uncomfortable.”

“Me too… I just came to fill the space. Sigh…”

“”…………..””

A deep silence enveloped us. I had never even held a girl’s hand, let alone had a girlfriend, so I was at a loss and remained still.

She silently glanced back and forth, taking in the surroundings.

The weather was a bit chilly. I wanted to suggest we go inside, as she shivered slightly.

“Um… now…”

“Um! Excuse me! Do you have a girlfriend…?”

“….Huh?”

“Well… I like you…! If it’s okay, could I…?”

“Ah… no, wait, why me…?”

The sudden confession felt like my head might explode. Why would someone so beautiful and kind be interested in someone so unremarkable like me…?

Suddenly—

“Eh…! If you don’t dislike me, then we’re dating, okay?!”

“Y-yes?!”

With her hands suddenly enveloping mine, and her gaze lifted to meet mine, her face was so stunning that I had no choice but to respond.

Suddenly, I found myself escaping the shackles of my virginity. It was all because a woman, one who seemed far too extraordinary for me, confessed her feelings first.

To be honest, at first, I thought she was just after something of mine. After all, we had only exchanged words, and she was so much more accomplished than I could ever hope to be.

Yet, my beloved girlfriend insisted that she looked only at me, that her confession was genuine.

While everyone else gazed at her beauty and form, I alone focused on her words and the depths of her eyes.

It was a nonsensical answer, yet the truth of it was evident in the fact that since we began dating two years ago, we had never once fought.

She was devoted to me, cherishing and loving me. In return, I did my utmost to reciprocate that love.

Before long, we had become the couple that drew envious glances from those around us. Well, mostly they envied me, not her.

“…I need to help out with some work now, so I’ll call you later,”

– “Okay! I love you!”

“Me too.”

I was truly, utterly happy. Even though my parents had passed, the void they left was filled by precious people in my life.

Days passed. I had gone back to the place where I once worked part-time, helping out and losing track of time.

“Oh dear… thank you so much. I didn’t expect it to take this long…”

“Don’t mention it. You did so much for me back then.”

The owner was the one who had run that small shop where I first worked, during a time when life was unbearably tough.

He had given me food when I had gone days without eating, and offered me a job. He had shared countless pieces of advice and comfort with me. He had been a tremendous help.

The owner handed me a generous sum of money as a token of gratitude, and I expressed my thanks.

Phew… finally, the work is done. I thought it would be quick, but there was more to do than I anticipated, leaving me no time to call my friends.

It had been a few days since they returned, but surely they wouldn’t be upset about my late call.

Let’s see… should I call my friends? They must have had fun without me. I should hear their stories.

Tring tring… click.

“Hello…”

– “Huh… h-huhuh…! W-who is this…?”

“…Is this Min-su’s mother?”

I had called my dear friend Min-su, but it was his mother who answered the phone.

The moment I heard the agonizing, desperate sobs of Min-su’s mother, a wave of anxiety surged within me.

At the same time, my gaze was fixed on the small TV, where a voice and image began to unfold.

– “…We have unfortunate news. A group of teenagers heading to a pension in Gangwon-do has suffered from a gas leak…”

– “Ohhh… Min-su… Min-su…!”

Min-su’s mother wailed as if the world was ending. The scene of the tragedy on the TV was a pension in Gangwon-do.

And… the place my friends had gone was a pension in Gangwon-do. Its name… OO Valley…

– A tragedy occurred at OO Valley in Gangwon-do. Due to the homeowner’s mistake…

“…………..Ah.”

When I heard the news and made my way to the funeral home, what greeted me were the faces of my friends, smiling beyond their graduation photos.

An atmosphere endlessly sunken. The world was howling with the grief of my friends’ parents.

“Hey… guys…”

This cannot be. How… how could this happen…

Tears streamed down, blurring my vision. Yet, surrounded by beautiful flowers, the friend in the portrait smiled so brightly.

– Son… son…! Nooo!!!!

– Huh… huh… sniff…

– ……How can the world be like this?

– Ha… haha… this is a dream, right, dear…?

The police arrived, looking somberly at the parents who were wailing and clinging to them.

The reason my friends had left was due to a gas leak caused by the homeowner’s oversight. While they slept, they had perished, unaware of the cause.

“Hey… guys…”

They were my second family, so kind and precious.

The world was so cold and indifferent. The lights that had appeared in my life, filled only with darkness. The angels who had offered me their warm hands had departed.

Thud.

I sank into my seat, gazing at the friends smiling beyond the portrait.

The words they had offered me, coming close first and asking to be friends, echoed in my mind. I remembered the warmth of the hand resting on my shoulder.

All the days spent with them. The days that were hot and cold. Every memory of us crying over the smallest things.

They scattered and faded away.

“Uaaah…!!!”

And so, I had to let go of my second family, in such a hollow manner.