The Hero’s Brother Is Bound To Be Depressed - Chapter 338



339 – What you mean

After returning to the academy, I headed straight to the Ministry of Magic dormitory. Now that you’ve done what needs to be done first, it’s time to tackle what you’ve been putting off.

I checked the list of students using the dormitory during winter vacation posted on the notice board at the entrance to the dormitory and confirmed that Ellie remained at the academy.

I went into the dormitory and knocked on the door of Ellie’s room, but there was no response from inside. If she wasn’t out, she was more likely to be in the training room or library.

Even though it was vacation, there were many students using the training center. It was like each person was shedding valuable sweat as they worked hard to achieve their goals. There were a few familiar faces, but none of them were the Ellie I was looking for. I left the training ground and headed towards the library.

The Academy Library was overflowing with visitors, befitting its size. The Academy Library was also a place where families could spend quality time in a warm, free place during the cold winter weather. As a result, it was inevitable that the general area would be a little noisy because there were many children.

Because it was wide, I kept moving while roughly checking the faces of the people sitting at the long table. Despite her mother’s restraint, she headed towards the banned books area to avoid the child running excitedly with a storybook.

It was a system in which the range of access to banned book areas was expanded by grade, but I, who was allowed to freely enter the banned book area, was able to enter the highest level banned book area, which only those with permission from the academy’s professor or principal could enter.

And as expected, I found Ellie sitting at a table in a corner with no windows where no one could walk, with several magic books next to her, using magic to move several pens at the same time to write something.

When I met Ellie after a long time, nothing had changed. No, she also seemed a little thinner than when I last saw her. She must have been in the library since early morning, and the closer she got, the stronger her strawberry scent became.

Because of that, forgotten emotions came back to life and I stopped for a moment. The urge to turn her body around and go back to the club room like this and the urge to say hello to Ellie in a friendly way collide in my mind. After caressing her chin and hesitating several times, she finally took a difficult step forward.

He was standing across from the table where Ellie was sitting, but perhaps because he was concentrating on his book, he didn’t seem to notice that I was getting close. Somehow I didn’t like that, so I reached out and closed the book Ellie was looking at.

Ellie, who was concentrating on her book, slowly raised her head and looked at me. The beautiful obsidian-like eyes turned round. I gave her a grave greeting, acting normal, to Ellie, who looked at her with her mouth slightly open and her blank eyes.

“… hi.”

Our gazes tangle in the air. Like someone who has been struck by a blow when she least expected it, Ellie, with her shocked face, tried desperately to get the words out of her mouth, but ended up swallowing them, unable to say anything.

The silence between us felt like it was strangling me, and I felt pressured to do something. So I said something random.

“What, you’re not even accepting greetings anymore?”

After I actually said it, I felt like I made a mistake. Since I had lost her memory, I had treated Ellie as someone I had never seen before, and now I felt like an idiot for asking her if I would not accept her greeting.

“Oh, no… no. So suddenly… “It’s just because it was sudden.”

Perhaps because she was speaking for the first time today, Ellie’s voice was more subdued than I remembered. Ellie shrugged her shoulders and studied her expression for a moment before asking in an expectant voice with her slightly watery eyes.

“I can’t believe I remember…” “Are you back?”

I nodded slightly as Ellie chewed her lip and anxiously waited for my answer.

“also… I thought you would remember. We did that… “Because it wasn’t a casual relationship that could be easily forgotten.”

I don’t know what Ellie expects from me regaining my memories. She said, recalling in her mind the purpose of her visit to Ellie, so that she would not go the other way.

“I have something to tell you. “I have something to tell you.”

At those words, Ellie looked embarrassed and flinched so much that the chair shook. Ellie, with a light blush on her face, seemed to be embarrassed by her behavior, and slightly raised the corner of her mouth.

“me too… “I had a lot of things I wanted to say to Ross.”

The obsidian-like eyes were full of expectations. I just smiled without any further explanation. Because it was the highest level in the forbidden book zone, there were not many people who came here, and because it was located in a corner, I thought it was a good place to avoid other people’s attention, so I didn’t bother to move.

I sat down in the empty seat across from me, leaned to the side, crossed my legs, and looked at Ellie. It was a bravado to look even a little relaxed.

A smile never left Ellie’s face, as if she was happy that I had regained my memories and came to see her. It seems like he is pleasantly imagining that maybe our relationship will go back to how it was before.

Ellie looked a little hesitant, looked at my expression, and spoke cautiously.

“I was studying hard to retrieve your memories… “But I’m really glad my memories came back.”

“I got my memories back by chance.”

Ellie seemed to think that this coincidence was her luck, and paused for a moment, muttering that she was truly fortunate. Ellie, who was biting her lip, looked straight at me and spoke forcefully.

“I wanted to tell you how much I regret and reflect on the bad things I have done to you.”

As he said that, his obsidian eyes were wet with tears. Because of that, the sadism that had been sleeping inside of me unleashed itself.

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A sadistic urge to see more of the woman who had made things difficult for me cry for me. If this is mixed with the inferiority complex that has remained in Ross for a long time, it will surely explode uncontrollably like gunpowder on fire.

Before that happened, I came to my senses and answered.

“Ellie, I don’t plan on making the same mistake again.”

Ellie shook her head at my firm voice. Because of this, she had the illusion that her tears were scattering from her wet eyes and sparkling beautifully.

“I didn’t mean to do that either. Because I have no intention of giving Ross a hard time again. just… I was so happy that Ross’ memories came back. Even though we can’t go back to the way things were before… But that doesn’t change the fact that we were childhood friends.”

Ellie seemed a little nervous as she wiggled her fingers on the table, so I confirmed in a firm voice that what she said was correct.

“That’s right, I don’t intend to go back to our old relationship just because I got my memories back. “Because we are in a relationship that hurts each other.”

With a face that looked like she was suppressing tears, Ellie hesitated to answer for a moment, then averted her gaze and spoke in a pitiful voice.

“… I was prepared. “Because I did everything wrong.”

Contrary to her words of determination, Ellie’s eyes, which had been filled with anticipation, were full of disappointment. Still, the sight of Ellie admitting her own mistakes made me tempted to look at her in a corner of my heart. She managed to resist the sweet temptation of giving Ellie her chance too.

Ellie, who must have interpreted my silence differently while I was resisting temptation, spoke up.

“If it reminds you of any other mistakes I’ve made that I’ve forgotten… . You can curse at me as much as you like. Because you deserve it. “I ask for forgiveness as much as you want and in any way you want.”

I strengthened my chin as I saw Ellie lowering her gaze while saying that. Is Ellie truly remorseful? Or is she cosplaying as a sinner? Ellie’s appearance in the previous world was much later than now.

There hasn’t been time to truly regret it yet. It was Ellie who had done something to me all this time, so it was natural that I couldn’t trust her easily. And it was even more confusing because I said something vague that could be interpreted in many different ways.

I feel like the act of handing me a whip so I can whip myself however I want is a planned move to provoke me in a bad way… Isn’t this making too much of an assumption? My mind is complicated.

Trusting Ellie is close to gambling. I couldn’t resist the temptation of gambling and ended up making a choice that turned the game upside down. But as fate would have it, the board came back to me, and I sat down fiddling with it.

Ellie is the only one who can solve the quantum jump problem right now. Even if you don’t use Quantum Jump right away, if you want to use it someday, you have no choice but to get Ellie’s help.

Of course, if you use Quantum Jump with Roel as your companion, it will be beneficial to both sides… That was too far away. My experience so far and the writer’s sense tell me that using Quantum Jump now is the right answer.

To be honest, I’m scared. I was worried about how much damage this relationship would inflict on me again and whether it would become a scar that would remain in my heart forever.

However, I had no intention of avoiding the situation just because I was afraid of what would happen or the pain. It may have been like that in the past, but I have grown into an adult who can smile even through pain.

I spoke in a low voice to Ellie, who was silent and looking at me with anxious eyes.

“I won’t insult you. I have no intention of asking for forgiveness from you. The desire to hurt… “I have no intention of sharing the pain.”

“It means you will never forgive me…” ?”

“No, that’s not it. I just… .”

I have to admit it now. This is what Ellie is and what she means to Ross. I let out a sigh to catch my breath. And said.

“… “Because I have no choice but to forgive you.”