The Sage that the Sword Saint is Obsessed With - Chapter 40



40 – 10. The Path You’ve Walked (2)

1.

There was a time when someone asked Levyn about her childhood.

“How were you when you were young?”

What did she say back then?

“…I don’t know.”

Yes, she said she didn’t know.

As if she had no memories of her childhood.

But that wasn’t the case.

From a young age, she had hidden and suppressed her own emotions, making herself unaware of her true feelings.

Expressing gratitude while not knowing if she genuinely felt it, shedding tears of sadness without knowing if she truly felt sorrow.

Real and fake.

Unable to distinguish between them, her expression became rigid, and her emotions dried up.

Despite the stability brought to the home through the efforts of the family, Lwenn’s hardened face never softened.

She lived on, creaking like a doll.

“Lwenn, our daughter.”

Lwenn’s mother approached her, her arm bandaged from an injury during the suppression of monsters, helping Lwenn wrap the bandage.

“If you ever face difficulties, lean on your mom anytime.”

Lwenn replied with a resolute voice.

“…I can handle it on my own.”

Endurance had become a habit.

From then on, Lwenn swallowed worries and concerns, not even confiding in her parents.

She considered it a burden, feeling like a nuisance.

So, despite the hardships, she decided to endure.

Over time, Lwenn embarked on adventures as an adventurer.

“…I’ll see the world.”

Lwenn’s parents rejoiced, thinking she had a dream.

Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case.

Because there was a limit to the money that could be earned through requests in this region, she went to other areas to earn more.

Was it greed for money?

No, it was because they had been poor until then.

Thanks to her parents’ efforts, they were harmonious even in poverty. However, compared to other houses, they were lacking and impoverished.

It was to the extent that dreams had to be given up.

Even looking at Lwenn alone, being an adventurer wasn’t her original dream. She dreamed of becoming a priest. She wanted to become a healer, traveling to cure sick children like herself.

However, to immediately resolve the present poverty, entering the church would mean a decrease in income. Moreover, to become a priest capable of using divine power for healing, she needed to study theology.

Which required money.

So, she gave up and became an adventurer.

Building on the swordsmanship taught by her father, she honed her own skills.

She hoped her siblings wouldn’t follow suit.

She left her hometown to pursue adventures, hoping they would dream and chase those dreams, earning money.

And so, Lwenn left her hometown for an adventure.

Traveling through various regions, Evan took on missions to subdue threats and earned money. He diligently sent more than half of his earnings back to his hometown.

“…Entering the forest alone is dangerous.”

From this point on, it’s a story Evan knows well.

Evan, entering the forest alone.

Chased by a monster, he was saved by Leven.

He remembers.

The day he first laid eyes on Leven.

The sight of him, with a stern face, defeating the monster, felt as dignified as a flower blooming alone on a cliff.

“Don’t follow me.”

“It’s dangerous alone, isn’t it?”

“I can handle it alone.”

“But still, isn’t it safer with two people than one?”

Evan followed behind Leven.

At first, he was annoyed.

He wanted him to leave.

“Go away.”

“Sorry, I can’t extinguish myself because I’m not a flame.”

Every time he threw a chilly joke and chuckled, Evan wanted to punch him. And he did, at times.

“Do you know that?”

“Don’t talk to me because I don’t know.”

“People with dirty personalities are often dishonest.”

“Are you insulting my personality?”

“…”

“Answer.”

“I… spoke falsely.”

Sometimes, a faint laughter escaped.

He couldn’t remember how long it had been since he laughed.

He thought he had completely forgotten how to smile.

“Try this.”

“I won’t eat it.”

“Try it. It’s freshly made, so it’s piping hot.”

“I said I’m not… whoa!”

Evan fed Leven a piece of freshly grilled meat.

Leven glared at Evan, hesitating as the morsel approached his lips.

Gulp.

“How is it? Tasty, right?”

“…Not really.”

“Really? Well, I guess I’ll have to eat it myself.”

“…Wait. I’ll have another piece, just one.”

Evan chuckled at the less-than-honest gesture.

“Why are you laughing?”

“Because it’s cute.”

“W-What? Don’t say weird things!”

Time passed.

Being together became more familiar.

Before he knew it, it felt natural to have Evan by his side.

Around that time…

“I like you!”

Evan confessed his love to Leven, handing him a single flower.

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“…”

From a distance, Evan watched himself confessing to Leven.

He remembered that moment vividly.

It was the most nerve-wracking day of his life.

He was certain of facing rejection, yet he couldn’t hide his feelings any longer.

Leven remained expressionless.

Seeing that only confirmed Evan’s suspicions.

Ah, I’m going to be rejected.

But he wasn’t.

“…Me too.”

Leven descended down the hill.

At that time, I couldn’t see it, but it’s visible here.

Leuwen descending the hill.

He shields his flushed face with both hands.

The reddened complexion isn’t solely due to the sunset.

Returning first to the inn, Leuwen leaped onto the bed.

“Ughhh!”

Hitting the bed incessantly, unable to contain his joy.

I didn’t know.

At that moment, I thought I’d responded nonchalantly with indifferent feelings, but it wasn’t that way. She felt the same.

Evan continued to follow Leuwen’s memories, trailing after a white butterfly.

I know everything about it. And I also know how this story ends.

Leuwen unfolded the letter.

A letter stating that the hometown was attacked, and parents were no more.

Leuwen deliberated whether to disclose this fact.

After much contemplation, the decision made was separation.

“…I don’t want to be a burden.”

It’s a deeply ingrained habit since childhood.

Believing that seeking help from others and depending on them is a nuisance. And having never relied on others, Leuwen didn’t know how to depend.

Having endured until now, Leuwen bore it this time too.

The sorrow.

“No. I don’t think you’re a burden,” Evan approached and said to Leuwen.

Yet, Leuwen seemed not to hear, and the next day, leaving Evan behind, parted ways.

They thought they couldn’t dismiss Evan with indifferent words.

Hence, they blamed, insulted, and raged.

The sky tore apart. As if Leuwen’s heart tore apart.

It wasn’t just the one suffering who felt pain.

The one causing the suffering felt it too.

Leuwen left Evan.

“Sigh… Hic…”

Leven stifled a sob, her breath hitching.

“…As I thought, it’s not.”

Leaping off the cart, she knew she didn’t want to part ways after all.

Family was precious, but Evan was just as much family to her.

Leven ran.

The cart had gone far, and she had hours of running ahead.

Upon returning to the village, she made straight for the inn.

“Evan…!”

She swung open the door to an empty room.

Evan had left right after their parting.

He didn’t want to linger where memories thrived.

He didn’t want to stay where Leven’s scent lingered.

So, he departed in the opposite direction of her path.

Her legs weakened.

Leven sank onto an empty room’s floor.

She realized a grave mistake, one that was now irreversible.

Leven wailed, a gut-wrenching cry escaping her.

Clutching her head, she struck her cheek.

She poured out her sorrow as if the inn guests were staring at a madwoman.

Yet, spilled water couldn’t be gathered again.

As night fell, she staggered out of the hollow inn.

Empty eyes glanced sideways.

Evan had always been by her side, but he was no longer there.

Since returning to her hometown, she hunted.

She focused solely on slaying beasts.

Choosing to discard what was dear, she wielded her blade frantically, as if by doing so she could forget the pain even a little.

At times, when sadness overflowed, she plunged into perilous beast dens, slashing and fighting through the tears.

She couldn’t afford to die leaving her siblings behind, so she fought fiercely, even at the risk of her life.

I lived such a life for several years.

Knowing it wasn’t atonement, I carried it out as if it were, bearing a sense of duty.

In the end, no one became happy between the two.

It was only worn-out and miserable.

It could have ended with a happy ending, but with one mistake, it turned into a complete bad ending.

As if the play had ended, the world slowly darkened.

Soon, Evan was left alone in complete silence.

“Sigh….”

He let out a deep breath.

He had observed a person’s life from an omniscient perspective.

Daring to evaluate her life as an ordinary human, it was as sublime and miserable as a flower blooming on a fatigue-stained battlefield.

The spirit to sacrifice oneself is not something anyone can have. Even if they have it, how many actually put it into practice? Regardless, what is certain is that she had been practicing it since she was young.

However, sacrificing oneself is not always right.

Because we are human.

We think wrongly.

We make wrong choices.

We make mistakes.

It’s a slow process of learning.

Where is a life without regrets?

Where is a life without lingering attachments?

To have even a little less regret and fewer attachments, humans make mistakes.

Her agony over her own foolishness is also part of the learning process.

The crucial thing is to gain enlightenment through that learning and decide when to step forward.

Regrettably,

Leven is unable to do that at all.

Not because she didn’t gain enlightenment.

It’s because she can’t find a reason to move forward anymore.

It’s just pitiful that she is like that.

A white butterfly flutters in the darkness.

Evan, who had been staring blankly into the darkness, followed the butterfly.

A butterfly that was guiding somewhere disappeared, vanishing like dust.

Instead, a giant black millstone appeared in front of Evan.

The millstone creaked and turned, measuring a red thread.

“…Is that the cause?”

Evan could feel the mana of the dream witch from the millstone.

The composition was complex, but it was not impossible to solve.

Spell destruction.

“Huh?”

The magic rebounded.

It wasn’t because the composition was interpreted incorrectly.

The millstone itself rebounded the magic.

Evan stared at the millstone for a moment. Then he discovered a door underneath it.

A black door.

It seemed to be seeping out through the gap as the material of the thread.

“…”

Evan glanced at the door for a moment, then approached it closely.

Unlike other doors, this door did not automatically open even when approached.

-Thunk

Evan pulled open the heavy door.

Light diffused.

Warm wind blew, scattering his hair.

Darkness tore apart and flew away in the wind.

When he regained his senses, he found himself in a flower field covered in white dandelions.

“What is this?”

Evan stood still and looked around.

Dandelions were blooming as far as the horizon.

“What is this place?”

Laughter echoed.

Evan turned his head and saw a tree.

The laughter came from that direction.

Under the shade of a tree, there was Leven.

Leven, who could be considered a doppelganger of Evan, was joyfully playing around.

She made dandelion flower rings, shared warmth by holding hands, and playfully exchanged kisses.

Leven seemed happy.

“…Leven.”

Leven, with a wide smile, turned to Evan in surprise.

“How…?”

Leven’s pupils trembled as if she had seen a goblin.