The World I Was Supporting Was Real - Chapter 82



82. Will, Faith, Heart, Conviction, and

‘Haa… … .’

How did it come to this?

He went all the way to the church to see her again, and instead of meeting her, he was told by the saint that “If you want to meet her, you must officially believe in the Gwooden religion.”

So, he strongly decided to just give up on seeing her again. He didn’t want to be entangled in the church’s plans like this.

Who was he?

His strong will, which had never failed to do what he set his mind to, was his great pride.

Moreover, he was a cold-hearted figure with a somewhat uncompromising ideology—he never unilaterally trusted anyone, even if they were allies, and he believed that even if they didn’t want to, they had to be sacrificed to achieve the greater good .

Therefore, Ares firmly believed that this whole thing could just be passed off as a small happening, but.

‘… … .’

When he came to his senses, he found himself unable to sleep, having spent the night wide awake.

After thinking about it for days.

The idea that Sister Karen didn’t exist felt like a lie, or rather, that concluding she didn’t exist was false.

Linea wouldn’t lie to him, and the Saintess had, after all, vaguely alluded to her being “unreachable due to a lack of clear facts”—

It was obvious she had approached him using the alias, Karen.

Whether the Saintess had ordered it, or for some other reason—that alone felt like the truth now.

That is.

At least, it meant she wasn’t someone disguised as a nun who had been sent to him.

And at the same time, if she *was* a nun, then it was also certain she worked at the Igwogweodeun Cathedral, and nowhere else.

Hell, even now, if he closed his eyes—he vividly recalled the times he spent with her, filling the hours with endless chatter—

And the content of that chatter was mostly about what went on at the Igwogweodeun Cathedral.

Some of it, while not particularly important, included things that only someone working as a nun there would know.

Considering the details of the conversations with Karen that he still remembered now, it didn’t seem likely she’d been dispatched here.

And, if he could simply identify her as a nun—

Finding out who she was wouldn’t be difficult, not with his position as a prince.

‘I’m sorry to the Saintess… but I definitely want to meet her and apologize.’

If it had been in the past, he could have used his princely authority to find the nun by force,

but with the Saintess’s arrival, the Emperor’s conversion, and the public’s overwhelming support, the religious order’s power was skyrocketing, and doing that would clearly cause him to lose out in the power struggle.

Even if that wasn’t the case, asserting his authority that way wasn’t Ares’ way, either.

‘Let’s investigate simply.’

If he narrowed down the priests working at the Igwogweodeun Cathedral to only nuns, their number would be several dozen… at most, maybe a hundred.

In any case, with that number, he could definitely find her using his intelligence network.

‘I didn’t want to go this far, but… I can’t kneel before a saintess.’

Thinking that, he immediately mobilized his network.

The target: information about a ‘nun with brown hair and brown eyes.’

Ares immediately sent a maid to bring a man.

On the surface, he acted as a gardener in the imperial gardens—

but in reality, he was the leader of a spy organization that Ares had personally cultivated, preparing for the moment everything would be overturned.

The man, feigning tension, spoke to Ares in a serious tone.

“Your Highness. If you summoned me… does this mean the time is finally at hand?”

“No. It’s not that.”

“…Huh?”

The man, having heard the main point from Ares, tilted his head as if puzzled.

“Is that really all it is…?”

“Yes. I don’t need detailed information, just find out her name.”

“Could she be some extremely dangerous woman or something—”

“It’s nothing like that, so you don’t need to worry too much.”

The man’s lips twitched as if he still felt uneasy—

but then, he nodded slowly as if he had come to an understanding.

“Understood. Since it’s an order from Prince Ares, it couldn’t be misguided or meaningless. I shall gladly obey your command.”

“Thank you.”

Now, all that remained was to wait.

I had no intention of pressing her or making her uneasy, just because I might learn who she was.

I simply wanted to offer an apology. That’s all I wanted.

But—

* * *

“…You’re saying there’s no such person?”

“Yes. At least, based on the description you gave, there isn’t a nun matching that appearance.”

After sending the man away, Ares immediately sank into thought.

Brown hair, brown eyes, even the small mole near her mouth—

This was the result of his investigation after piecing together a rough sketch of her.

Was she not affiliated with the Igwogwedon Cathedral? … No. That couldn’t be it, he’d already concluded that.

‘…’

Ares recalled his stepmother and his eldest sister.

After meeting Saint Erin, they claimed to have ‘seen’ something…and became completely different people, their faith in the Gwedon religion turning devout.

And it wasn’t just them. Baron Loengreen and Count Ernest also suddenly became different after meeting the Saint.

Judging from the accounts, it seemed they had encountered an illusion.

They claimed to have ‘faced God with the aid of God’s plain facts,’ but from a third-party perspective, it simply looked like they were caught in an illusion magic, confusing reality and fiction.

Just like that—

Could everything he experienced have been just part of an ‘illusion magic’ prepared by the church?

If the Saint freely wielded magic that seemed miraculous, couldn’t she show such vivid illusions without him even realizing it?

When he posed the question to himself, the answer came back, disappointingly quick.

‘No way.’

It can’t be.

The breath I felt, the times we laughed together, playing games, enjoying each other’s silly jokes.

The warmth I felt when our bodies touched… that was definitely not some kind of hallucination.

Karen existed. Even now, closing my eyes, I can feel her scent lingering around me!

And it’s not just a subjective opinion, objectively speaking too.

The common thread among those who’ve spoken is that, “after speaking with Erin, they faced the Bible”—but Ares never faced the Bible, he just enjoyed various board games with her throughout the training period.

Anyway, the only conclusion left is this—

‘From the beginning, was she someone prepared specifically for me by the Saintess?’

If that’s the case, then using my network to try and find her will just be like searching for a needle in a desert.

Ares thought.

What’s the most certain way to meet her right now?

And—

* * *

“Huh? You’re saying you want to convert to religion…?”

“That’s right.”

Ares said, bowing his head 90 degrees towards the Saintess.

—The most certain way to meet her.

It was, to grant Erin’s request.

In this process, Ares’s ‘rationalization’ shone once again.

By imperial decree, the state religion became Guodeonism -＞ Guodeonism is gaining much support from the people -＞ For the sake of the greater good, popular support is necessary, and with the Emperor converting and one of the royal family becoming a Holy Knight, a royal like himself will inevitably have to believe in Guodeonism whether he wants to or not -＞ Therefore, converting now isn’t that strange.

He absolutely couldn’t bring himself to ‘abandon the greater good to meet Karen’, so he once again patched together a tattered excuse, but –

Anyway, if this could achieve his goal, then it didn’t matter.

The only one who could extinguish a man’s burning passion was the one who ignited it in the first place.

He wanted just one thing.

To apologize. And, to say thank you.

He hadn’t *entirely* dismissed the thought of progressing to something good with her, the nun, but he also knew that was difficult.

Of course, now he wondered if she might not even be a nun anymore, but that was a secondary issue for now.

Erin, initially taken aback, soon offered a very benevolent smile.

“When you scheduled this so suddenly, I wondered what was happening, but you’ve chosen to believe in Lord Guogudeon… I can’t help but congratulate you! Then, let’s immediately begin the holy ceremony to accept your faith—”

“Wait a moment, Saint!”

“……Yes?”

Ares, this time bowing deeply, spoke.

“Um, it’s rather ridiculous to call it a favor… but, I have a request.”

“A request, you say?”

“I wish to meet Sister Karen… the one you sent to me. Please, allow me to meet her.”

Yeah.

If you want me to believe in religion, I’ll believe.

If you want me to abandon the greater good… as long as this peaceful world is maintained, then… I’ll abandon it.

So.

So please, just let me see Sister Karen.

Let me feel that warm sunlight that first fell upon me again.

“Ah…”

But.

Contrary to Ares’s expectations, where he anticipated a positive reply for having his request fulfilled—

Erin, in an utterly cold tone, said:

“Well, I’m sorry. Like I told you last time, all the plain facts have been used up.”

“Huh?”

“I don’t think that will be possible.”

“Wait… just wait a minute. So, even though I told you I believe in the Guedon faith?”

Ares, his expression one of utter incomprehension, raised his voice.

“Saying that you’re short on plain facts, that means my faith is insufficient, so you’re telling me to devote myself to religion, right?”

“Huh? No, that’s not it. Now that I think about it, you misunderstood that last time we met too, didn’t you?”

“Misunderstood…?”

“You said you couldn’t just suddenly devote yourself to religion, right? So, that wasn’t some roundabout way of explaining things.”

“Meeting Karen, that’s the plain facts of Igueguedon. God loved Ares and bestowed plain facts upon you, and that period is over.”

“…….???????”

“So, what I’m saying is, your ‘limited-time plain facts’ have ended.”

The period is over?

Is meeting someone a limited-time thing?

Karen-noona called me a “contractual connection”???

No, hold up, where’d this “contractual” bit even come from, as if it’s some bland fact?!

Words that just don’t fit, randomly thrown together.

But, the saint’s expression was so damn resolute, Ares couldn’t even think of a rebuttal… he managed to squeeze out a question, barely.

“Then… what am I supposed to do?”

“To see Karen-noona again… what do I have to do!?”

Looking at Ares’s pathetic plea, Erin wore a sympathetic face… and stroked the Bible in her arms.

“Well, it seems you’ll need to pray with all your heart, right? The only one who can deliver a bland fact is the one true God, Yigwogweodon. But everything is ultimately in God’s will, so…”

“That can’t be…”

Facing the completely distraught Ares–

“It looks like we should talk about conversion next time. Take some time to gather yourself, and if your mind hasn’t changed, schedule another appointment. Well then…”

Erin, the divine representative, slowly left her seat, giving him time alone.

And so, left alone in the empty reception room of the cathedral, Ares—

Slowly knelt, bringing his hands together.

And.

‘…Oh God.’

To a god he’d never believed in.

A god he’d never thought could ever exist.

To Yigwogweodon, a god he’d thought was only a construct created by religious zealots to manipulate the world—

‘I, Ares, will now acknowledge your existence.’

— For the first time since birth, I offered a prayer from the bottom of my heart.

‘If you are truly a god, you can read my thoughts, so hiding anything would be foolish. Therefore, I confess honestly. I admit I never believed in gods. I also admit that I thought of religion as something to be reformed, and a thing to be sacrificed. I even admit that I resolved to eliminate my own family, including my mother and sister, if they became an obstacle to the greater good.’

‘If you sent Sister Karen, it must have been to teach me something. Honestly, I admit that I still don’t know exactly what that is. But what I need is the grace of God. The blessing of God. The mercy of God—the plain facts of God.’

Now, I think I understand.

Why religious people call everything in this world ‘plain facts’.

If something so sweet and fleeting is a plain fact… then this feeling is.

The will to not yield in the face of hardship and trials, to take one step further.

The unwavering belief in permanence, something I will never let go of, no matter what.

The tenacious heart that never gives up, even when falling short of others.

The conviction that I will never let go of the thread of communication, no matter what the situation.

And—

‘Please, just one more time, let me meet Sister Karen. I ask for only one thing, to apologize to her. And to tell her thank you.’

‘If you tell me to believe in the Guodendron faith from now on, I will believe. I won’t mistake your miracle for white magic. Please, please give me… plain facts.’

From noble mtl dot com

‘Even if it’s temporary plain facts… please grant them to me just once more. I beg you, Yiguoguodeon…!!!!!’

— Love.

A young man, having dared to fall in love with a nun, offered a fervent prayer to God.